Must be 'cause of Global Warming

We now have alligators in New Hampshire.   A three footer was captured yesterday in the Lamprey River near Portsmouth NH.  A town police officer, assisted by a state fish and game warden captured the reptile alive.  And a good thing for the alligator, summer may be nourishing up here, but I don't believe alligators can take it when the river freezes over in winter.  Global warming hasn't gone that far, yet.  This story made the front page of the Manchester Union Leader. 
   Up here we aren't that used to alligators yet.  A three footer took two men to deal with it, and caused a front page story.  Down in real alligator country, Florida, a nine foot gator showed up at an elementary school.  The school resource officer, a strapping young blonde woman,  all by her self, got a rope around its neck, flipped it upside down, and duct taped its jaws shut.  We need some practice before we get that good at dealing with gators.

Florida girls are pretty tough

This was on TV.  Florida, nice sunny day, an elementary school building.  Nice and neat and well kept. Lawn is mowed, sidewalks are weed free.  All is in order except, for a seven foot alligator strolling along the sidewalk.  Gator is in an ugly mood, snaps at the camera, snaps at everything.
   The school resource officer, a strapping young blonde woman walks up to the gator and drops a rope around its neck.  This sets the gator off, lot of writhing and snapping and bad temper.  Blonde is not fazed, she gets the gator turned upside down and duct tapes its jaws shut.  Then she calls animal rescue to haul it away.  All in a day's work.  She didn't even get her uniform mussed up.
  Pretty tough young lady.